The Brotherhood – Part 117

The Brotherhood of the Second Cross was established on Father’s Day 2005 where 160 men stood before their wives and children to pledge themselves to purity, self-sacrifice, loyalty, and excellence. Today, hundreds more have joined the commitment.

Here’s hoping your kids exceed you in many different ways…

Ever noticed how much your children resemble you? Oh, I’m not really think of the physical resemblance, though that can often happen. People tell my youngest son that he looks like his dad, and I watch to see if that brings a look of panic to his face. So far, he doesn’t seem too concerned, but…

No, the “like dad” part I’m thinking of is in actions and attitudes. On that score, my oldest son shows up on the radar. People tell him that he thinks and acts like me. Actually, both of my guys seem to have a lot of that in them. And I like the thought that they want to mirror my stronger qualities.

But I want them to go further.

You see, some dads can limit their kids by expecting them to be too much like dad. They can want them to follow in their footsteps, maybe commit to the same career path, or withhold approval until the child makes the same kind of choices dad would make. Some dads never stop with their expectation that the kids be like them, even limiting their children’s potential to be what they are truly designed to be.

I know that as a dad, my kids’ greatest need is my respect and approval. My boys need to know that I believe in them and am proud of who they are becoming. I need to celebrate when they succeed in their own paths, even when those roads are the kind I’ve never walked. If they have to be like me in every area in order to be applauded by me, then I am hurting them and limiting their futures to the boundaries I’ve already found.

Big mistake!

The better plan is to want your kids to exceed you—to know what you know, but to learn even more. Their unique gifts and abilities should be the target. Doing all they can with what they’ve been given is the goal. Sure, some of that will look like you in the journey, but some of it will be a new path they forge for themselves.

That’s what you want, isn’t it? When they exceed you, then you have established a legacy that proves greater than your own life!


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